A Resolution

I have just returned from three days and nights sitting blindfolded by a lake. I needed the solitude and time to seek some glimpse of understanding why my last joke wasn't liked. However, when the answer kept coming "Uh, it wasn't funny?"... I had
to accept it.
Never the less... I resolve to elicit an all-caps "ha-ha +..." sometime in 2021.

So. Two blondes stumble in. One, after realizing where she is, leads the other to the bar. She asks the bartender "Is this the bar that just kicked us out?" "Not yet." he answered.

A monkey and a Gypsy walk into a bar.
Bartender : "Starlight Productions, two blocks down."
Wow. It's quiet in here. Is my watch right?
OK. That wasn't the joke.
What did the monkey say to the produce clerk?
"59¢ pound? Where I'm from I
had bananas  in my back yard. Lions too, but...
What did the New York monkey say to the sandwich man?
"Do I wanna pickle? Wha'd'y'mean "Do I wanna pickle?" Do I look like I Don't wanna pickle? Do I look like I'm from Phila-Del-phi-a or what? Of course I wanna pickle. Sheesh. Do I wanna pickle? What kinda question is that? This is New Yawk. You buy a sandwich, you  get a pickle. You must think I'm stupid or somethin'. You think I'm stupid? Nah, I ain't stupid. You're stupid. That's who's stupid. You're stupid for askin' if I wanna pickle. And your momma's stupid for even raisin' you."

Deleted

*blows and taps on mic* "Is this thing working?"

A cop chased down a monkey and stopped him. "I saw you throw this banana peel in the street back there. What's up with that?" he asked.
The monkey answered "I'm sorry Officer. I was aiming for the guy that was crossing the street."

A monkey was sitting at a bar when two blondes came in. One girl asked him "Would you please move down so we can sit together?" The monkey thought "Wow. This is easier than I thought it woud be.", and said "I can do better than that Baby. We can go out to my van if you want to."



~
Why do blondes go out together?
So they can help each other find their way home.
~
"What did the monkey say to the two blondes in a bar?
" Hello ladies. I thought there might be a 50/50 chan.. Hey wait... I didn't finish."

So, a monkey sees two blondes at a table in a bar.
Swaggering over, he sits down at their table and says "Well, Ladies, this looks like my lucky night."
One girl answers "Yeah, you're lucky this glass is empty."